just, mumbling

i think i wanna cry here. Not because someone hurt me or someone scold me. But it is because SHE was hurt my friend, whom also my sister. Its not ok right!!!
I konow that this moment will come, but is it ok if you find out how everything goes with look at someone's email account?
I don't care if you badmouthing about me, because i already know (too) that you badmouthing me, even you badmouthing me with my friend. I know you underestimate me, thing's like 'Senja bisa apa sih' i already know that a few times. Even you said that you  not underestimate me. I know, iam hcome here without nothing, and i know that i can make application as fast as the boys, but at least i try.
If someday you found my BLOGSPOT, this BLOGSPOT i mean i will feel ease, because i don't have to talk to you again about this matter.
I know that you have the right mind to clear the understanding about you and my friend, but i think you don't need to look at her email. but wait, are you look at my email too? my facebook? maybe i will feel ease too if you look at it.

I know that my sentence is so rude here, i know that maybe someday i will regret the words i say here, but who care. You say to people that you already a boss here, and you have people here just to bring your bag, i don't care about that. Just don't disturb people who keep silent with your action.
You masd if i badmouthing you? then do i had to mad if you badmouthing me with someone else?
I know that you handle everything here, but please, don't make move on yourself.
Ok lah~ i don't know what to write anymore, because in my mind is so full of something that i wanna say to you. but i tired if i have to write all of them here
I just hope that someday you will read this post.
And that day i will you be someone new, not a very new, just don't appear in front of me with that smile. If you smile like that i already know that you dislike me, but you can't do anything, just talk to me, and say what make you like that.
And ONCE MORE! if someone mad at you don't mad too to other people who doesn't wrong anything.